it’s a miracle!

Trigger warning! This post is about my Big Fat Positive. I don’t mind if you stop reading now if you’re just not into another pregnancy announcement xxx

you guys…

Last week my blood was drawn but I didn’t dare to write it down. It was a BFP!

So today new blood test and it’s STILL POSITIVE!

I’m so amazed and grateful. My third IUI worked! I’m 5 weeks knocked up!

Hubby’s reaction was: “FINALLY” with a big cheer. It seemed that almost 2 years of trying weighed on him down as well, although he always is positive and helpful.

I must say, the fact that you are almost 2 years TTC and the treatments in the hospital, makes you react to such good news in another way then a woman who never have to go through that shit.

I mean: first you are overcome with joy, and 5 minutes later you worry “because it’s IUI and maybe it will not stick”. then you are full of joy again because you never got this far, and you are officially pregnant and you JUST WANT TO ENJOY THAT. Only to have a complete nervous breakdown the day after because “we didn’t even try IVF, maybe Nature is just playing her crudest joke on me EVER”.

Oh wait, are that hormones? 🙂

I never peed on a stick after just a couple of months trying to celebrate with hubby in the privacy of our own home and telling the friends and family after a reasonable two or three months. Instead you are called in the middle of the day, expecting the worse, feeling numb, hurrying in an empty meeting room, try not to cheer to loud to the lady on the telephone because your collegues might hear you and having to announce your pregnancy to Hubby by telephone. Emerging 15 minutes later with a big grin (but not too big, because you never know it might go wrong) and trying not to look any of your collegues in the eye…

Then you tell your parents in the evening and my mother becomes hysterical and says “I get to live that moment” (she’s a bit older than most mums, so her biggest fear was that I could only be pregnant at 40 and she will by then have complete dementia/in a wheelchair) and you have to tell your mum to chill because it’s IUI and maybe it didn’t work and we have to wait another week for confirmation but she just keeps jumping up and down.

I never had to be this “careful” happy about good news.

It’s not the way I imagined to become pregant and to announce my pregnancy to my family, but in fact I don’t care!

I’m pregnant and that’s all that matters. I would gladly take blood test every day if that is what it takes. It makes me realise why people say that pregnancy is a miracle. Because after 2 years wanting, crying, trying, it is a miracle! there are no other words for it.

Thank you, my WordPress buddies, for the support! You are such sweet, supportive people!

And I’m so hoping that you guys will have good news soon. FINGERS CROSSED!!!!

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