the good housewife

hello internet,

Just said goodbye to my cleaning lady and said hello to superb clean house!!

Yes I admit it. I have a cleaning lady now. 

For 7 years I did everything myself: cleaning and tidying the house, washing clothes, and picking up my caveman’s dirty socks. My caveman is my boyfriend and he calls himself “The Caveman” because he never tidies up after himself and he’s proud of it. But that’s okay, since he cooks and irons. So i turn a blind eye every time I find dirty underwear 20 cm from the laundry basket…

I must admit, I’m not the best housewife in the world. I can’t cook, bake or make my own clothes. The women around me however, seem to do all those things and doing them perfectly. Oh, and raising kids at the same time. And have a blossoming career of course…

I’m not one of those women… I clean up really good if someone comes to visit me. You won’t find a dusty corner to bitch about it to your other perfect friends!!!  But when it’s just my caveman and me, the house is… well… a cave. Especially since we moved to the big house of Granny. I just couldn’t cope with it anymore. Working in the garden is just so much more fun than cleaning… and a bigger house means more surface, I never knew it would be such a difference to my former little home…  So my mother, tired of rolling her eyes everytime she enters the cave, ordered I’d take a cleaning lady. 

AND I’M LOVING IT!

So I don’t care what my friends say: “THOU SHALL CLEAN YOUR OWN MESS UNLESS YOU HAVE CHILDREN”. Having a cleaning lady if you don’t have children seems decadent to them and a waste of money.

I don’t have children. So sorry that’s I’m decadent, which also means I provide a job for someone ( hurray for the economy)

My childless collegue said it beautifully last week: okay, if you have kids, then you don’t have the time to clean any more. However, if you don’t have kids, than you have more spare time which you fill up with fun things like parties, exhibitions and long walks/bike rides, so you also don’t have time to clean EITHER.

She’s right on.

I have a cleaning lady but no kids and I am proud of it.

xxx little dragon

 

First post! let the bitching begin!

Hi internet.

 

I’m very sure nobody will read this blog. Like ever. But still, I thought I’d give it a go.

So if I found some curious reader, here I begin. First some things about me.

I’m a girl who just turned 30, so that’s like very old already. I have a nice job (with annoying bosses but who doesn’t), I live in a beautiful house (ok, which I rent from my mother) with a huge garden (which is such fun to work in, and that’s not said in a sarcastic way) and I met the most wonderful funny CUTEST guy ever 5 years ago. We are not married because, hey, we feel like it already and I don’t want to wear a big white dress.

 

Oh yes, and my mother tongue is not English, so please forgive me for any mistakes I will make.

 

You wonder what should I write about?

Let’s see…

 

You know, sometimes you just want to shout at the top of your voice: LEAVE ME ALONE YOU ….. (options are: you annoying boss, you annoying shit driver, you old granny who crosses the streets at 1 km/hour, you annoying pregnant lady, you annoying too perfect lady, etc.).

 

instead I do it (i.e. bitching) quietly on this blog. It’s better for my mental health and for maintaining the view of the nice little girl people think I am.

 

 

So, first annoying thing I want to bitch about is: pregnant women. actually, all stuff related tot babies.  not babies in itself though, they are ever so cute and too little to be annoyed with them. oh, and did I mention I would like one of my own? I’m not the baby-hater that everybody thinks I am, but I’m just SO fed up with all these pregnancy issues that fly all around that I would very much want to bitch about those things.

 

You think that after a long search on the single men market and ending up with the last thing on my mind (at a time when I was actually chasing somebody else who wasn’t taking the hint) but be completely smitten about him and are grateful every day that you found him (even when he’s sometimes a bit of a caveman), you will be perfectly happy for the rest of your life.

 

I always thought I was happy with my lovely boyfriend who cooks, irons, and loves me intensely…

 

but then society, mother nature and my own mother and friends started to put ideas in my head, like I can’t be happy because I don’t have children.

 

and are children not the most beautiful thing in the whole world? “It’s the greatest joy I have ever experienced” (my sister-in-law who took care every single day of her children without once going on a private date with my brother without the kids)

“who are you going to leave all your money to” (my mom, maybe she means her money, and she fears that I would spend it all on some weird ecochique lifestyle with too much chianuts and ethical booze in it)

“i mean like i’m soooo proud and i just looooooove them, i soooo hope that you get one too so that they can play together” (practically all my friends)

 

Problem is this: we already tried for 10 months now to get pregnant. And I’m of course getting completely crazy. Reasonable me knows that conceiving sometimes takes a while. Crazy me on the other hand freaks out completely at any day overdue or a sore breast.

 

I know what you will say though… hey, just relax and don’t think about it!

 

As I discovered however, It’s completely IMPOSSIBLE not to think about children when you want them.

 

IMPOSSIBLE!!!!

because they are everywhere!

I have a pregnant collegue next to me, all my friends who are in a relationship have them and the whole world seem to talk only about it! like CONSTANTLY. and I’m getting very upset. It’s everywhere in the media and even my freakin’ boss can’t stop asking me: don’t you have something to tell me? are you pregnant? (she’s freakin’out because my collegues are hitting the 3 months birth holiday one by one and maybe she fears there will be no one left….)

And it’s not only my boss who suspects me being/wanting to get pregnant. My whole friendcircle can’t just keep their mouths shut about it. “ooooh you will have such wonderful children” “oooooh you’re holding the baby soo good, you’re going to be a mommy soon”   “are you thinking about children? well are you? are you???” (puppy eyes included)

 

So because I was well raised and a little introvert, I prefer to type the following answer to these questions, instead of screaming them hysterically:

SHUT THE FUCK UP BLOODY HELL THAT’S SUCH A PRIVATE THING KEEP YOUR NOSE OUT OF MY PRIVATE AFFAIRS I WILL NOT EVER TELL YOU THE ANSWER YOU BLOODY SOCIETY CONFORMIST LEAVE ME ALONE I’M JUST WEIRED SO DEAL WITH IT!!!!!!

 

GOD!

 

well, that felt good. thank you internet. watch out for my next post.

 

xxx little dragon